EFT is based on the latest bonding science. We now understand our essential need for human connection. When couples are not securely attached to each other they exhibit defensive behaviors and build up emotional barriers. Without a secure relationship, people become distressed, tense, irritable, or discouraged – all the feelings that drive couples and families apart. This disconnection is painful for everyone involved.
The goal of EFT is to create a safe and secure emotional bond between partners where they can again enjoy a relationship filled with satisfaction, intimacy, trust, and love. EFT therapists are responsible for creating a safe environment where couples can explore and discover their spouse is not their enemy; they learn to see the vulnerable side of their partner and how their partner hides fear and pain.
EFT therapists act as guides for couples as they help them de-escalate negative patterns of behavior. The focus is on the present. There is a discovery of the tender and vulnerable emotions that are hidden, protected and when left unattended they fuel insecure bonding. Couples in therapy learn how to have positive and meaningful interactions. Through EFT, couples discover what makes their partners feel vulnerable and how to fulfill their emotional needs. In therapy, couples have new safe experiences with each other and practice new ways of interacting and making sense of their partner. As relationships are rebuilt, couples naturally resolve repetitive problems without contention and decide things together as a team. This is where couples find relief and experience a deeper emotional connection and secure attachment.